I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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