I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
