wakey wakey hands off snakey
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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