I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
