You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
