I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
