Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club

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(248): real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club http://tfl.nu/ouuf

Replies (1) Good night (1250) Bad night (584)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers

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(920): Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers http://tfl.nu/3qjt

Replies (22) Good night (1075) Bad night (644)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..

(609): View more from New Jersey

AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!

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(609): Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?! (267): This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room.. (609): AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?! http://tfl.nu/dtle

Replies (37) Good night (879) Bad night (3700)
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(917): View more from New York City

Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that

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(917): Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that http://tfl.nu/jdka

Replies (6) Good night (5659) Bad night (712)
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(906): View more from Michigan

I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.

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(906): I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up. http://tfl.nu/m243

Replies (16) Good night (4055) Bad night (933)
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(314): View more from Missouri

screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.

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(314): screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all. http://tfl.nu/filb

Replies (21) Good night (5598) Bad night (990)
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(845): View more from New York

We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.

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(845): We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey. http://tfl.nu/dkad

Replies (38) Good night (3933) Bad night (1748)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid

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(306): How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid http://tfl.nu/1mq4

Replies (9) Good night (1103) Bad night (4624)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Is my lip ring still in your hair?

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(412): Is my lip ring still in your hair? http://tfl.nu/frbe

Replies (5) Good night (907) Bad night (1901)
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(217): View more from Illinois

not the best booty call

(1-217): View more from Illinois

did she squirt?

(217): View more from Illinois

only if tears count

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(217): not the best booty call (1-217): did she squirt? (217): only if tears count http://tfl.nu/kmd7

Replies (7) Good night (899) Bad night (3384)
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(478): View more from Georgia

Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend

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(478): Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend http://tfl.nu/itrv

Replies (4) Good night (1182) Bad night (633)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.

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(+44): You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste. http://tfl.nu/s042

Replies (3) Good night (748) Bad night (413)
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(678): View more from Georgia

Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.

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(678): Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times. http://tfl.nu/yq2x

Replies (15) Good night (1786) Bad night (468)
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(812): View more from Indiana

Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?

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(812): Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner? http://tfl.nu/i2e0

Replies (13) Good night (667) Bad night (395)
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(561): View more from Florida

He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."

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(561): He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating." http://tfl.nu/nn4t

Replies (4) Good night (1002) Bad night (420)

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