Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.

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(410): I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night. http://tfl.nu/l8h9

Replies (14) Good night (2079) Bad night (572)
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(516): View more from New York

you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny

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(516): you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny http://tfl.nu/9x6z

Replies (9) Good night (606) Bad night (2997)
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(301): View more from Maryland

My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.

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(301): My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake. http://tfl.nu/il6h

Replies (12) Good night (1220) Bad night (3522)
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(678): View more from Georgia

This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...

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(678): This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home... http://tfl.nu/c5f1

Replies (11) Good night (4381) Bad night (1534)
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(229): View more from Georgia

He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.

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(229): He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records. http://tfl.nu/dlha

Replies (41) Good night (8996) Bad night (1046)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."

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(978): as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..." http://tfl.nu/w3wh

Replies (17) Good night (5934) Bad night (1448)
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(416): View more from Toronto

Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career

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(416): Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career http://tfl.nu/ywum

Replies (5) Good night (2750) Bad night (1101)
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(516): View more from New York

the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.

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(516): the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother. http://tfl.nu/cizt

Replies (24) Good night (1310) Bad night (7199)
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(248): View more from Michigan

i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.

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(248): i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina. http://tfl.nu/jhba

Replies (16) Good night (4935) Bad night (1044)
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(440): View more from Ohio

im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.

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(440): im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology. http://tfl.nu/d4l9

Replies (14) Good night (3093) Bad night (1490)
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(714): View more from California

There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?

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(714): There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed? http://tfl.nu/o0fs

Replies (11) Good night (702) Bad night (1729)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.

(1-704): View more from North Carolina

im still drunk. birthday week begins.

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(704): i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat. (1-704): im still drunk. birthday week begins. http://tfl.nu/iqvd

Replies (2) Good night (1329) Bad night (459)
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(765): View more from Indiana

Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.

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(765): Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater. http://tfl.nu/rsqd

Replies (4) Good night (1497) Bad night (543)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap

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(508): Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap http://tfl.nu/gn8d

Replies (1) Good night (766) Bad night (416)
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(678): View more from Georgia

His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".

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(678): His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high". http://tfl.nu/jgmh

Replies (1) Good night (572) Bad night (387)

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