I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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