Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
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