I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
