She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
