I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
