You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
