haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
