And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
