oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
