I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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