just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
