I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So vagazzling was a success
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
