Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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