therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
did i just pee glitter
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
