Fuck appropriateness.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize