You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
