it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
