If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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