he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
