I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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