Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
