I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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