To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Randomize
