I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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