i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
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