Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
