theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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