He's been sleeping iwht ***
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.