Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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