when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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