walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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