i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
someone threw a dead crab at me
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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