So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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