O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
you win again, gameday.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Randomize
