That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
