Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
