I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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