We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Randomize