wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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