Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize