Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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