Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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