are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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