I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Randomize
