dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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